Anxiety for me is that least favorite cousin who shows up every month at my doorstep on his own will and refuses to leave until an unspecified time. How he travels is an entirely different story and I have various versions of it. But I am gradually learning the art of making anxiety serially depressed and anxious about its own self. To the extent that both I and my anxiety end up sitting next to each other bitching about the world together like bffs. You ask how? Let me share this greatest secret here with you!
Note: Do not, I repeat do not follow the coping habits mentioned in this article if you are anxiety-stricken because I receive an orgasmic pleasure in making fun of my existential crisis instead of actually handling it like an adult! It may work for me but not necessarily for everyone! Serious-skulled, please leave this space asap!
6 Ways I Turn My Anxiety Anxious!
When I think about bailing out on a lunch date with friends, but actually do not! It’s quite depressing for anxiety to watch me having fun *even if I have a panic attack later*
When I binge-watch Netflix and get my brain stunned for the day. No brain, no anxiety! Only a death stare on my face!
When, instead of crying in the toilet at work, I stay still, give my emotions a phantom flush and avoid giving the game away to anxiety!
When I am not even bothered to work on my anxieties because (A) I am too lazy & exhausted, and (B) Read point A. Therefore, sorry anxiety problems, you will have to wait till I figure something out!
When I read anxiety memes and laugh my lungs out thinking all of this is me! Anxiety takes a back seat and delves into a deep thought about how to better make my life miserable!
When I am on the brink of self-destruction but I still order my favorite food leaving anxiety out of the whole narrative. Because “Food over bad thoughts”, always!
While everything seems to bring a panic attack, a hysterical unknowing laughter in the middle of nowhere pisses anxiety extremely off! And this one is totally safe to try!
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